I’ve said it before, many times – and I’ll say it again – the phrase “this book could change your life” is VERY MUCH over used in Publishers’ press releases and on book cover blurbs, but but here is a book claiming not only to change your life, but to do it in a mere 7 days! But then, this is Paul McKenna, a very successful person indeed, so let’s find out what kind of weight we should lend these bold claims!
In a world where people have been in therapy for many years, and are still no nearer a cure, or at least not appearing to be, it might at first seem totally and completely absurd for Paul McKenna to claim either he or you or anything you can change your life in 7 days. Then again, people thought the world was flat for 1000′s of years, it didn’t mean that a rounded earth was an impossibility – it just meant that the correct information/approach hadn’t come along yet! Those who have been reading this book reviews blog for a while now, will know that I have dipped into a fair number of self help books and also indulged in the odd hynosis self help recording too! When a new friend of mine told me she had been trained in hypnosis and NLP by Paul McKenna personally in London, it inspired me to try out a few Paul McKenna books, as she seemed very positive about Paul and his work. And despite all the self help books I have read – there are still times when I need help, even if it’s just a little boost, so I thought it would interesting to read Paul McKenna’s Change Your Life in Seven Days and see what it could offer me! I should note that I did read the book just like a book at first; however it contains plenty of active exercises which you need to work through if you are hoping for that big change – just reading is not enough, you have got to help yourself! However, now I have got an overview of the book, I am going to go back and work through the exercises, as I do believe there is some mileage in what McKenna has to offer.
Firstly, if you’re looking for an easy read, and not mountains of text to wade through, and also look for good value in a purchase, then this could be well be a factor consider, as you not only get the book, but also a FREE mind programming CD (although I am not too keen on the marketing of it as FREE in capitals – you are in effect buying a book and CD!). So you get a book and a “mind programming” CD. Paul Mckenna makes much of the idea that you can re-program your brain, using the image of “installing” new software. This is not as revolutionary or crazy as it may sound – advertisers spend billions of pounds/dollars seeking to re-programme people’s minds, and it works very well – or they wouldn’t continue to invest so much in advertising programs! How refreshing it could be, then, to spend a little time re-programming your own mind in order to some of the results YOU want!
If you have not read any of Paul McKenna’s serious books before, you might still retain the rather less serious image of him as a TV personality and comedy stage hypnotist – he is in fact a highly educated (with a doctorate) person and has spent many years researching into what makes people tick, and how to make them tick better – covering fields such as hypnosis and NLP (neuro linguistic programming). He draws much of the advice contained in Change Your Life in Seven Days from his knowledge of NLP. If you’re not familiar with NLP, it is basically a system of psychotherapy which, instead of looking into what’s wrong with people, actually looks at what works well and seeks to replicate this. So for example, McKenna has studied the behaviour patterns of 100′s of successful and confident people in order to find out just what makes them successful and confident, and he brings this knowledge to his self development systems. There is more information about NLP on the net, try this WIKI NLP entry for a little taster. In any case, although Neuro Linguistic Programming is a relatively new concept, it does seem to have a huge number of benefits, one of which is it can work very quickly where other forms of psychological conditioning can take years!
So, Change Your Life In Seven Days uses McKenna’s knowledge of NLP, the power of suggestion, and other knowledge and research he has picked up during his illustrious career (there is much more to him than the stage hypnotism he is so well known for – he has trained 1000′s of people in NLP and hypnosis techniques and helped many rich and famous people through fears, phobias and addictions). It should be noted that unlike some of his other titles, he does not say “I can change your life in 7 days”, instead the title is more of an istruction that “YOU are going to change your own life, and indeed this is the format the book takes.
It is structured to be easily manageable, to be read in 7 chunks over the week. Depending on your lifestyle, you may or may not be able to read it in the 7 days, but there is nothing magic about the 7 days – you will not suddenly “fail” if you go over. Of course the title is a bit misleading, book titles so often are. You MAY find your life instantly and irrevocably changed once day 7 ticks over (indeed I have read books in a day which have profoundly changed some aspect of me or my life) – but this is a very bold claim/aim, and is not really what the book intends to do, I think. 7 days is a good benchmark to aim for though for actually reading the book – and I would say if you are fairly new to self help concepts, then if you spend 7 days reading, and really getting into the techniques described in the book, then it will be a 7 days that sees you at the start of a journey which, if you take on the challenges and persevere, really will be the start of a life changing experience that will take you forward to new heights, new challanges, and levels you never would have thought possible before.
Self Help books ought always to come with caveats, however – and it would be irresponsible of me if I didn’t mention a few negatives. By and large the reviews on Amazon are very positive, with 5 stars from the majority of independent reviewers – but this doesn’t mean that the negative reviewers don’t have valid points. One serious point is that many NLP enthusiasts claim that their techniques work for everyone, and this is a claim McKenna makes early in the book. To claim that one particular system will work for everyone is actually quite silly – even pharmeceutical mega companies recognise that pills they pump millions of research dollars into, may only end up working for 50% or less of patients. I don’t think the claim is dangerous in anyway – but there are people in our society who suffer significantly from mental illness, and help for them needs to come from a professional, rather and a self help source. Another criticism that could be levelled, is that McKenna makes a lot of use of quotes and examples of famous people who have endured adversity only to go on to be big successes – the idea being that you have to fail 100 times in order to get the 1 success that will take you places. Of course you have all the people who not only failed the first 100 times but also the 500th as well – while it is true that you make your own luck, we are not all going to wind up millionaires by adopting an optimistic frame of mind! And there are no doubt people who do everything right, and who still fail miserably… But of course this would have no place in any self help book whose purpose was to make you live more positively! But I just thought I would thrown in a cynical paragraph, as I’m sure it crosses most people’s minds when they come across self help books with bold claims!
All that said, having read through the book, I do believe it has some very valid and very significant information, laid out in a simple and accessible format, which, if followed through and practised enthusiastically, coupled with the mind-programming CD, will lead to very significant, even profound changes in people who use the techniques. Change Your Life in Seven Days is a brilliant book for most people stuck in rut, who want to work with accessible NLP and self hypnosis to make improvements in their lives. The real message of the book is actually the opposite to what is suggested in the title (and this is probably a clever bit of suggestion deliberately thrown in there by Dr McKenna!) – Changing your life in 7 days is a grandiose, even absurd claim – but it is by following the often very tiny steps in the book, changing our behaviour in what would at first seem not very significant ways, that major and profound changes CAN ultimately be achieved in the way we live, work and run our lives
The phrase “this book could change your life” is much over used in Publishers’ press releases and on jacket blurbs, but there are books that do change lives – not in all cases in the spectacular fashion that some books may claim, but in more gentle, subtle ways. Peace is Every Step is such a gentle book, and certainly the Buddhist perspective from which it is written is one that has improved, changed, even saved a good few lives!
In the rush of modern life, particularly in the West, and now in the fast becoming Westernized eastern nations, human beings have largely forgotten how to live in the moment and to access the peace that can be found in each moment – we tend to dwell on the past, or our minds rush headlong into the future, making plans that might or might come to fruition, reacting to things that might happen or might never happen, trying to avoid things we don’t want to happen – or if we can’t avoid them, we at least try to avoid thinking about them! Modern life itself is unstable, unpredictable, and is full of unsatisfactoriness which makes us suffer – stress, anger, need, hate, greed, seem to persist long after we have solved most of the practical problems that living in the world presents. In this book, Thich Nhat Hanh, a Zen Master, monk, peace activist and poet, shows us how we can make use of the situations and circumstances that normally leave us feeling stressed, antagonised and negative. Through the Buddhist practice of mindfulness, we can learn to live and find joy and peace in each moment, and grow from the manure, as it were, of our problems and negativity.
Although it is written by a Buddhist monk, and essentially draws on the Buddhist principle of mindfulness, Peace is Every Step does not attempt to draw the reader into Buddhism, but concentrates on helping readers live in the moment and be happier people – both for their own sakes and the sake of others. In deceptively simple language, Thich Nhat Hanh describes mindfulness techniques for dealing with anger and the like, as well as every day situations that might normally have us stressed – the ringing of a telephone, for example, is a reminder to breathe and come back to ourselves, if only for a moment; washing the dishes is an opportunity to revel in the sensations of warm water and to living fully in the moment.
We crave so much what is outside ourselves, he says – but we can enjoy a view of the sky from pretty much anywhere, and can return to the simply beauty of ourselves by using conscious breathing wherever we are – finding the meditative peace that we may or may not also find on the meditation cushion.
All in all this book was a breath of fresh air at a difficult time in my life, and the exercises and outlook certainly helped me. It’s the kind of book I will read again before passing on so somebody else can benefit. Thich Nhat Hanh has written other books which I will be looking at, as this book was very easy to read, and did not get heavy or lecturing despite having a very profound, albeit very simple, message to offer.
Peace, quiet, calm – it’s a commodity in this tumultuous, stressful world that seems ever harder to come by! Looking for it “out there” seems ultimately mistaken, so when I saw this Glenn Harrold self hypnosis Audio book, entitled, “Creating Inner Peace and Calm”, I knew I had to give it a go, as I have bought a number of other Glenn Harrold recordings in the past and have been very impressed with the results! So I now play this hypnosis recording regularly with a view to getting close to the peace that can be found within!
The CD is split into around 59 minutes, with two separate hypnotic tracks of approximately equal length, although one is slightly longer than the other. Both tracks make use of background music and subliminal effects, but the music is never obtrusive or the kind that is “relaxing” in an forceful kind of way, but rather integrated into the words and narrative that Harrold skilfully delivers. I find it very useful to play it at night, but sometimes if I can find half an hour during the day, it really does give me an oasis of calm which gives me lingering effects for some time – although as with most things, the strength of the effects will vary from person to person.
Harrold’s voice takes you through a hypnotic journey, beginning with some breathing exercises that gently relax the body, and then you are taken deeper and deeper inside so that the hypnotic suggestion can work on your mind in a very relaxed state (indeed all hypnosis really is, is a very relaxed, focused state which enables things to get through to your subconscious workings better). I had been very anxious lately due to family bereavement and illness, but found I managed to relax to this recording, and felt very positive when Glenn Harrold brought me back up – although the effects have now worn off somewhat, these CD’s are best used regularly to give the subliminal messages a chance to sink in and do their work at an unconscious level – so as soon as I have finished this article, I am going to lie down and play the first session again!
Happiness – everyone is searching for it, but how do we know that so few find it, truly? Probably by the continuous flow of self help books that reach the bestseller lists – achieve happiness through diet, image, riches, friends, travel, hypnosis, etc etc. Still more we look at the addictions around us and see people trying to gain happiness through drink, drugs, sex, power… The list goes on. In a world of truly happy human beings, there would perhaps be less conflict, less trouble. It is probably a tragedy in some ways that the Dalai Lama’s The Art of Happiness, co-authored with Howard C. Cutler, has sold so many copies and spawned a series of such books! For it speaks of so many who come searching, who have not yet found deep, lasting happiness, who still search for it and perhaps pick up this book. Then again, those who read the book cannot fail to have their lives touched in subtle ways, helping not only them, but having knock on effects on others they encounter. One thing is certain – there is suffering (and that is one of the Buddha’s 4 Noble Truths) – but the fact that there is suffering also means an end to suffering, and in its place happiness, some kind of liberation.
The Art of Happiness is subtitled “A Handbook For Living” – but don’t expect 10 practical tips for getting through your day or for dealing with road rage! The authors, rather, take us through an organic journey of discussions and observations, experiences and considerations, giving rather a general direction which we may or may not choose to follow. As with much of Buddhism, there is no right or wrong, merely the observation that certain actions lead to suffering and some do not. As probably the most famous Buddhist in the world, and an accomplised and learned man, the Dalai Lama could hide his message in lots of esoteric language and rituals; he is instead very human, bringing some of his Buddhist ideals and principles to us in very human and very accessible ways. In reading the book we gather the general guiding principles that lead away from suffering and towards our true purpose and birthright – the striving for, the right to be happy.
I picked up this book and started reading it in a Starbucks one rainy Friday afternoon. Why? Because I was addicted to something! For sure, I had kicked both my nasty habits of drinking alcohol and smoking cigarettes – but, as I learned from reading this book, I had actually replaced those addictions with something else, in my case a legal but relaxing herb purchased off the internet, which I would carry around with me to ease stress and relieve anxiety. Except every time I was without this herb, I would face stress and anxiety to the nth degree and couldn’t cope without this new crutch! Reading the book, it became clear what had happened to me, and I can thankfully say, thanks to this book, I have beaten another addiction!
The authors of the book write from the perspective of the “human givens” approach, which suggests that if human beings have all their emotional and physiological needs met healthily, they are far less likely to be prone to addictions, depressions, etc. This may seem to some a very simplistic approach. It is certainly full of common sense – if we are happy, why indeed would we spiral into self-destructive behaviour?! I guess people who have worked with serious addicts have seen all common sense go out of the window, however. Still, there are many people who have found the approach in the book to be very useful. Most interesting is the account of how the chemical and other processes in our brains trick us into addictive behaviour, and how this is actually the hijacking of a natural process that is, used properly, essential to our survival and development as a species!
All I can say is that after a number of attempts to give up my herb, after reading this book I have so far not relapsed or even wanted to. So whether you feel you might be addicted to coffee, drugs, alcohol, sex, shopping, tv, exercise, or any other thing that we might get addictions with, this book is certainly an interesting read and might just help you kick the habit
Stress is something which affects us all, an although I have used meditation and self hypnosis very effectively, stress is still something which keeps me on my toes, and I need all my resources to keep it at bay! We can always use some extra tools in our toolkit for managing stress, and I certainly do, which is why Everything You Need To Know About Stress Management appealed to me, as it looks like a hefty and knowledgeable tome, so I thought a good read of this would give me some extra resources – and I was right!
The trouble with stress, a lot of the time, is that we don’t really understand it, and we naturally fear and have trouble with things we don’t understand – and managing something like that is very hard indeed! Stress Management helps you to take a step back and understand why you react in certain ways to certain things, and helps you understand your stress reaction. It’s particularly interesting to learn how your body reacts to stress, the various chemicals produced in your body, and the effects these chemicals have – you learn that stress is a much more serious business than just feeling a little flustered or under pressure. Left unchecked, stress can have serious consequences!
Thankfully, the Managing Stress doesn’t stop there, but takes you on a personal journey through your own relationship with stress and stress management. Everyone is different, so this book does not attempt to pigeonhole you, but rather enables you to explore the many faces of stress, and helps you to identify your stress tolerance point, your stress triggers, stress vulnerability factor and your stress response tendencies.
Once these have been identified, you are better able to choose from the wealth of stress management strategies, tools and options presented by Managing Stress, which offers ways of better preparing your mind and body to deal with stress, ways to reduce stress (not avoid it altogether, for some stress is inevitable!), and ways to minimise the harm that stress does to your mind and body. Most of these stress management tools apply to both sexes, but some forms of stress are gender-specific, so there are sections both for men and women to deal with particular kinds of stress relevant to each.
This was a very easy book to read, well laid out, with handy tips on offer making it an ideal stress management book to read once, then dip into for reminders. With interactive quizzes to help you indentify your relationship with stress, and a wealth of tips, tools and suggestions, the book will appeal to many. Managing stress, as the book emphasises, is a life long process – but we all need to start somewhere, and if you have problems with stress, this book is an ideal place to start your journey to a life with less unnecessary stress!
I have come a long way in the last year, and it is thanks in no small part to a number of great books I have read, books which I have held sometimes as if I were holding the author’s hand and listening to their kind words of wisdom. Another such book I can now add to this book reviews blog is Tara Brach’s Radical Acceptance: Embracing Your Life With the Heart of a Buddha, a jewel of wisdom which comes from the Buddhist idea that we really need to open our hearts and minds to all our experience – including suffering – in order to live fully and happily. And that means to accept some things, and most of all to accept ourselves. It sounds so counterintuitive – to accept bad things, and especially to accept the bad things about ourselves – we are conditioned to want to improve every aspect of our lives. Neither Buddhism or Brach is saying this is wrong – but there are two ways of dealing with the things we cannot change – we can either mope, gnash our teeth and wail, or we can embrace it with acceptance and get on with it with a smile on our face!
Of course Brach does not put things as clumsily as I often do – but rather welcomes us into this philosophy through a number of personal and professional anecdotes which see Radical Acceptance in practice. Before I go any further I should note that although this book is written by a Buddhist teacher, it is very accessible and you by no means have to be familiar with Buddhism to learn something from this book – it is a mixture of Buddhism and therapy, leaning really towards a kind of therapy based on Buddhist principles (Brach is a therapist as well as a Buddhist). As soon as I started reading the book I had one of those “Yes! That’s exactly what I have experienced for 20 years” moments, as Brach related the all too familiar story of the “trance of unworthiness” many of us human beings so easily fall into. It is true that many successful people consider themselves failures, many of us fear that we are not clever enough, not attractive enough, not rich enough, not kind enough, and so on – we spend so much time listening to the voice of this trance that we hardly ever wake up to the true beauty and success of our lives, but Brach shows ways in which Radical Acceptance can help us to wake up and accept ourselves as we really are.
At the end of each chapter there are guided meditations and exercises to help the reader put the ideas into practice, from gentle awareness meditations to meditations and exercises to work on relationships and our reactions to negative emotions, making it a handy book to read and re-read, and try the meditations as you go along.
It sounds simple – be nice to people, and they will be nice back! Treat a friend with interest and respect and guess what, they will probably do the same back. Treat employees well, and they will be more productive. Sounds simple. Yet there are still plenty of people who do things the nasty way to get what they want – and the world over businesses that treat their employees like scum in the hope of squeezing that little extra out of them. Well, such people need to read How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie!
First published in 1936, this mother of all self help books as seen plenty of predecessors – yet it remains one of the most interesting and accessible guides on how to survive and thrive in a competitive and often unpleasant world. Since that first publication and Dale Carnegie’s talks all that time ago, millions of people have benefited from the simple and appealing wisdom to be found in this book. Of course no book can simply turn your life around without some effort, and although there is guidance there is no magic forumula guaranteed to work – life is no an exact science! But if you take even a quarter of the principles in this book and embed them into your life, I am willing to bet you would see some positive changes!
I had great fun trying out some of the techniques, and was delighted to see them work. I tried some out on complete strangers and the smiles were very rewarding – but I also saw relationships with people I knew improve as well. People who read this book reviews blog know I try to be a positive person – and this book is based on positive thinking, and the positive idea that you CAN appeal to people’s better natures – maybe not always, but definitely a lot of the time.
Just one example – today I had something go wrong with a website. I remember countless times before I read this book, sending snotty emails to the tech support, complaints, etc, and the problems would drag on. Well, this enquiry today, I followed some of Dale Carnegie’s advice, the problem was solved quickly and cheerfully, and everyone was happy. Now if only we could get just about everyone to read this book – what a world we’d live in!
(But you can make a start right now by ordering this book and learning how you too can win friends and influence people – or see below for some more great Dale Carnegie books )
The best time to quit smoking is now! Well, if you smoke, and are thinking of quitting, don’t delay too long – I am writing this around Christmas as 2007 approaches, and a lot of people think of quitting as a new year resolution. Thank God I won’t have to this year, as I have now been a non smoker for over a year, as I quit just before Christmas last year, maybe to give myself a head start. How I remember the utter dread, the utter panic, the withdrawals, the tantrums, the irritability, the pleading with myself to just have one, one would be all right, but then I’d be hooked again, wouldn’t I?! But what I remember more than all the horrible things is the sense of achievement, the pride in knowing that I was refusing to yield to the temptation, that I was making it. I had tried many times before, using gums, patches, dummy cigarettes, lozenges, pure will power, and combinations thereof, but never quite managed it. In December 2005, I found the correct ingredients (and the experience of failing before certainly helped).
I think the key is motivation. A lot of people think, “Well, I have to give up because it’s bad for my health” but that’s the wrong attitude. If you really want to give up because you want to be healthy, that’s a better starting point (the mind is our best friend and our worse enemy!). I think if you really want to quit, you will quit sooner or later. It’s not easy, and that’s why you should use all the resources available to you. Quit with a friend (maybe one you like to beat!), try the patches or gum, maybe even get a life coach to assist you with your goal!
Hypnotherapy is one method that works for a lot of people, but maybe we’re not all rich enough to be able to pay a therapist (although they are good, and it does often work!) – this is where audio hypnotherapy recordings come in very handy, and bestselling hypnotherapist Glenn Harrold has produced The Ultimate Guide to Quitting Smoking Forever which could prove to be a crucial tool in your battle to give up smoking. Remember the mind is a powerful thing, the unconscious mind even more so – and Glenn Harrold’s audiobook uses advanced clinical techniqes together with relaxing music and sound effects to calm your body and mind and enable you to use the resources deep within yourself. With post hypnotic suggestions and layered affirmations, the two sessions on the CD safely and effectively reinforce your own desire to quit and help your mind to focus on and stick with your resolution. It might not work for everyone (nothing ever does) – but it’s got to be worth a try, and I have used Glenn Harrold’s recordings before with great success – see my review of his Motivation recording as well
As a meditator with some six months’ experience, I have gone some way on my path of meditation. Although it is a lifelong path, my first footsteps have started my journey, and even the longest journeys start with a single footstep. It has been interesting that in my personal journey over the last year, I have listened to many voices offering advice, all of which have helped greatly, but often the voice we ignore is the most important one: our own. My meditation practice has resulted so far in greater confidence, a calmer outlook on day today problems, greater ability to manage stress, and enhanced creativity coupled with more positive thinking. It is true to say that it has been one of the more worthwhile additions to my life in recent years.
Of course the only real way to learn meditation is to meditate – you could read all the books in the world on meditation and be very knowledgeable about the subject, without knowing what the meditation experience actually holds (for in many ways this cannot be put into words, it can only be experienced directly). However, we all need teachers, and although the best teachers are human ones, in person, books have always been an excellent substitute for those keen to learn and research. On my meditative journey, a number of books have proved very useful indeed in providing information on meditation theories, practices and techniques, enabling me to get started, and if not taking me on the journey, at least offering me signposts in the right direction. I will be looking at these books in due course on this book reviews blog, but for now I will start with a book that provides an excellent introduction for beginners, and the wealth of information inside may also be useful as a refresher for experienced meditatoThe converse of something I said earlier is also true – just because someone is an experienced meditator, does not mean that they know all about the theory and practice (indeed practices) of meditation. The Complete Idiot’s Guide to Mediation is therefore a useful book for meditators at all different kinds of stages on their journey, and is most definitely not for idiots!
Written by Joan Budilovsky and Eve Adamson, The Complete Idiot’s Guide to Mediation is succinct and comprehensive, giving enough information about all aspects of meditation to whet the appetite of the curious, equip the intrepid and inform the experienced. Like all Idiot’s Guides it is broken into easily digestible chunks, and need not be read all at once, but is the kind of book that can be dipped into, although I would recommend reading it all the way through in the first instance. I certainly found myself marking off segments which I would return to later. So, in plain English, the book offers information on how to find a meditation class if appropriate, how to use mantras and healing sounds, how to use visually based meditation techniques, how meditation can improve health, how to breathe properly when meditating, and explores meditation with yoga practice and poses, as well as different meditation techniques from around the world. There’s a summary of Zen techniques, tips for learning how to use meditation in daily life, such as in stressful situations, an exploration of the connections between mediation, sleep and dreams, and it also has some useful diagrams and photographs showing possible poses for meditation practice.
A lot of people claim they don’t have time to meditate, and there is certainly no point in trying to force or cajole people into meditating if they are not, at this time, interested – it would simply be impossible. When you’re ready to begin you’re meditative journey, you’re ready, and if you’re not, you’re not. However, I can honestly say that since I began meditating (now for around an hour a day), I seem to have a lot more time, my mind is more focused so I get things done more quickly, and if I happen to be behind schedule or have a deadline, it doesn’t seem to be a life and death matter any more, and believe me I used to suffer very much from stress and anxiety (although please note that I still do suffer from these, but the meditation has been a very useful addition to my armoury, and proves to be more effective the more I do it – one thing this book will tell you is that having too many expectations about meditation is why many people give up when a few sessions don’t transform there lives!) For sure we are all busy, and meditation may not be for everyone – but with a book like this available there is no longer an excuse to put off finding out at least a little more about meditation. The Complete Idiot’s Guide to Mediation can be read over a few weeks, perhaps on the train or bus, perhaps 10 minutes a day during a lunch break. Indeed, you might even get so intrigued you make more time! Just analyse how much time you spend, say, chatting with a colleague, or watching soap operas, or perhaps moaning or worrying! Believe me, reading this book could change you life – although it is more likely rather to set you on a life-changing path, or give you potential for this, or perhaps less dramatically give you some food for thought about the mysteries of meditation
